I don't know if I'm going to stop writing here altogether, but I've fallen for Tumblr. I'm very sorry, Xanga. Then, I also have a Blogspot and other such nonsense. I seem to have problems with blog host infidelity.
She had done all the things he wanted: screamed, cried, pleaded, kicked..and gave up. He left her in the dark stable, limp and wet from tears and sweat and him. He didn't kill her--too many people knew they were together that evening, and he didn't want a scandal.
Scritch, scritch, scritch... with a stolen stick of ink leaving specks of lies around, under: fingernails lines mattress
No poetic, filmic crumpled sheets littering like invincible snowballs Around a wastebin valley. Only furious Xs
I bought two graphic novels today with my giftcard to Borders. I hope I enjoy them. One is Y: The Last Man and one is Fables. Both are Vertigo comics, which tend to be very good, in my opinion.
Every now and again I want to either have a kid. On these days, there are varying degrees of "child" I want. Some days I want to be merely pregnant, 7 or 8 months. Some days I want the tiny infant that knows nothing and everything. Some days I want the child who can almost speak, and flirts with the men and women around with big smiles and sub-speech cooing. Most of all, though, I want to have a child to buy him/her shoes. I think that's a sign I should stop working at Payless before it's too late.
I feel much like Holden Caulfield...like every thought I have is utterly self-indulgent, self-centered, and entirely too selfish. But then, aren't we all? Yes, of course, we are. Our own thought processes cannot function outside ourselves, so of course they're all about me (or you, or my dad, or Angelina Jolie). We cannot help being self-centered, because there's no other point of gravity our minds will orbit around...
On an entirely unrelated note, I love when I find the beautiful things in people completely by accident.
I've learned that shutting my mouth helps. Not lies, just avoidance. It's nice to know we don't have to make elephants of the ants. It saddens me a bit though that I can't talk about how I'm feeling. But I guess...it makes me get over it quicker...So that's nice.
It's funny, I've never been on this end. I've never been suspected of cheating, and that is when I did. Now that my vow is in question, I'm left reeling with how ludicrous that is. I wouldn't, I couldn't. Not morally, it has nothing to do with morals. I have moderate moral fiber at best, and I'm willing to admit that. However, I could not imagine a being on this earth worth that mistake.
She is everything. Why would I ever risk giving that up?
No, no. I understand. It is the underground rumbling and we're suffering as a result. I understand why we both doubt, both question. We both once had faith, and the crumbling foundations left us as rabbits. So now we look, look, look. Shadows everywhere, but they are only reminders of a moving sun. That bastard.
The pillars are monsters, the corners are omens. Doors are traps, windows are obliettes. The sun is in the entirely wrong place. Come in, come in!